No one likes to feel rejected. Even though it might sting, rejection is a good thing — it can help you learn and grow.
Most importantly, it teaches you what you’re really worth. Just ask anyone who’s been turned down for a job they really wanted.
Rejection has a way of making you think twice about the next time you approach someone for something important.
However, if that someone is you, then things get tough because rejection feels so personal.
When we feel rejected, it can make us doubt our value as people and as friends with ourselves afterward.
Even though it’s not always easy, there are ways to say no that doesn’t come across as rude or shallow. Keep reading to discover 5 pro tips on how to say no that actually work.
Why it Feels Hard When Saying No
There are four main reasons that saying no can be tough.
- You’re afraid of what the other person will think of you.
- It’s not your style to say no.
- You want to avoid hurting the other person’s feelings.
- You feel like you should help them out.
If you feel like these factors apply to you, then it might be a good idea to take a step back before outright refusing someone’s request.
Instead of saying no right away, try saying something along the lines of “I really appreciate your offer, but I don’t feel comfortable accepting it at this time.
If that changes in the future, I would love to hear from you again! Thank you so much for reaching out!”
That way, if and when they do contact you later on down the line, you won’t have already said yes and regret it.
Why Saying No is Important
There are many reasons you might have to turn down an invitation or a request.
Maybe you’re too busy, it’s not your thing, or maybe the person just isn’t that into you.
No matter what the reason is, saying no can be difficult because we want to make others happy. However, saying no can also teach us about ourselves and make us stronger for it.
Saying is difficutl because it make the other person feel rejected which cause the person pain.
Saying no does not mean rejecting someone completely — in fact, saying no can be a part of accepting someone else as well.
If someone asks for something from you and your answer is “no,” then that could be a chance to learn how to say yes in a different way.
This will help you grow and ultimately strengthen your relationships with people around you by learning how to accommodate them while still maintaining your own needs and desires.
In addition, if someone doesn’t take the “no” negatively but rather tries to understand where they went wrong in their approach, then your relationship with them just becomes more personal and honest.
When to Say No
The most appropriate time to say no is when you’re feeling guilty about what you’ve done.
If you’re thinking of skipping a workout or eating a piece of cake, it’s so tempting to say yes because it takes so little effort. But if your guilt is overwhelming, then saying no makes more sense.
It will help you sleep at night and feel better about yourself in the long run.
So, if you face any trouble saying no to something when you’re already feeling guilty, try saying no to something else that feels more important than whatever it is you’re struggling with.
Just Say No, Don’t Rehearse
If you know you can’t deliver your commitment due other commitments or you lack a particularly skill to do something, just saying no saves your credibility. It’s a trait of successful people.
But some people hesitate to say no. So, they start rehearsing saying no.
Instead of saying no, you might be tempted to rehearse a rehearsed apology.
By doing this, you might end up apologizing before the other person has even asked for an apology.
When you apologize before someone asks, they will feel rejected and may not want to receive your apology in the future.
Instead of rehearsing an apology, just do what comes naturally – say no! When do it for some time, it’ll become your habit.
Just say no to bigger responsibilities and more opportunities that take away from what is most important in your life.
Let go of the things that are not in alignment with who you are and what you want out of life. It’s improve your productivity.
Don’t Offer Explanations
Many people are tempted to justify their decision to say no.
They might try to explain why they can’t do it, offer an excuse, or give a reason as to why they can’t.
But this is a huge mistake that could potentially get you into more trouble than you would like.
Letting people know why you’re saying no creates an obligation in your relationship with them and oftentimes creates tension.
The best part of saying no is that it needs no justification.
It doesn’t matter what the other person thinks of your decision or how much time you spend on it — all that matters is that you stick by your decision and don’t apologize for it afterward.
Offer an Alternative
Sometimes, it’s best not to respond to an offer.
For example, you can suggest a different time or place for someone’s request.
If the current plan isn’t ideal for both parties, then they’re likely going to be open to other options.
Also, it’s vital to remember that people who want something very severely will often put up with a lot of things before they get it — so don’t be afraid of saying no!
Saying Maybe is Right Sometimes
In a world that’s constantly evolving and changing, saying no can be difficult. People want to be liked, and they want affirmation.
Sometimes saying yes to things we really don’t want to do is actually a bad idea.
It might mean we experience more stress in our lives, or even worse — we may not be able to say no the next time something comes along.
When you feel pressured into doing something you don’t want to do, saying maybe is right sometimes.
Just because someone asks us for something doesn’t mean they should get it immediately.
Sometimes we need space and time away from people who are asking us for help or attention so that we can reflect on what we truly want out of life.
Sometimes, saying no just doesn’t feel right. It can be pretty tough to know if you should say no or not, but with these pros tips, it’s easy to say no that actually works.